Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
I'm in a hotel full of Marines. I'm leaving here pregnant.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
Randomize
