are you so shy because you have an std?
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
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