Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
