Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Randomize
