Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
