Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
