Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Randomize
