apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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