he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Randomize
