i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
take it from a girl who woke up with a girl in her bed... you were not that drunk.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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