I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
My pussy is not your playground.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
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