Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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