put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
