if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
from now on my penis is your penis
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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