so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
If you die first, I'm going to sleep with a pallbearer at your funeral.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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