try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
Randomize
