Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
Randomize
