The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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