I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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