Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
accomplished twins. life is a go
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
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