he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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