So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
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BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
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