Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Randomize
