Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
