Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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