How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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