There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
Randomize
