it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
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