I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
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