i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
So. Much. Porn.
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