On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
