jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
