I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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