Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize