I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Randomize