The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
