is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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