Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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