So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
I need to align my fucking chakras
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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