Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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