we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
