I'm jealous of your bromance
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
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