i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
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