do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
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