STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Randomize
