Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
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