the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
