if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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