my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
