Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize