Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Made fish tank punch. It's like trash can punch but in a fish tank. Also, my dad saw a picture I uploaded on Facebook and called me a pussy for only making 10 gallons.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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